Innocence Lost – A True Cost of Divorce
My best friend asked me tonight if I missed my ex-wife (missed the love we had). I replied, “You know what I miss? I miss the simplicity”. He looked at me questioningly.
I didn’t mean to sound cold. My ex and I had been through a lot together, and that had its costs, but of course I missed her much like any man who’s ever fallen in love would miss the good times he spent with a woman he called his own. Yet after years of dealing with relationships in the aftermath, what I’ve come to long for the most is truly the simple understanding of love I once knew.
And so I turned and told him the best analogy I could muster. I said, “when you’re young, it’s like being in a house together that has no exits. When the house catches fire you do everything you possibly can to put the fire out because if you don’t, you’ll die. But once you get a divorce, you realize there’s a back door. From then on, when a fire breaks out there will always be a choice. There will be a point where that fire gets too hot, and you’ll want to run for the door. You might not always do it, but you’ll always know its there.” And I looked at him and shook my head, “I miss not knowing there was a back door.”